I like tattoos. I like people who have tattoos, I like looking at tattoos, and I like obtaining tattoos. Last year, after much deliberation and Flickr searches, I decided to get a tattoo of a butterfly. I got it on an area of my body that many communities refer to as "the love handle." I chose this area because it makes the butterfly seem like it's floating - as opposed to an area like the shoulder, where it would seem like the butterfly was "resting" on a surface. I show it to people all the time, and aside from the standard "what does it mean? / that must have hurt!" I always get the exact same inappropriate, presumptuous, stock response: OH MAN! JUST WAIT TILL UR PREGNANT! THAT THING GUNNA STRETCH LOL.
No one ever asks if I'm going to have kids. (I'm not.) No one even says "if you give birth," it's always "when you give birth." It's like women have their own Death 2.0 - like we all have to face the inevitability that we will one day produce offspring. It's just an innate fact of being female - we all desire children.
I'm never going to have kids - ever. I'm going to get a tubular litigation as soon as I have a real job and can pay for it. The only future children I will ever have will be adopted. And I don't even want to get married until I'm at least 32, so that means the possibility of kids are well over ten years in the future. I'm sorry that I'm not living The Central PA Dream of finding a fiance by the time I graduate college. The only person I've actually dated in college is currently under house arrest. (I guess he'll be in charge of the dishes, huh?) Everyone I know keeps getting engaged and talking about how they're ready to settle down and share their life. I don't want to share my life - I barely even got to use it yet.
By the way, I heard this exact same reaction 1,000 times when I first got my belly button pierced. YOU'LL HAVE TO TAKE IT OUT WHEN YOU HAVE KIDS LOL. Even if I wanted kids, that would be a stupid reason to not get it pierced. What if I save my precious vessel for five years in the anticipation of childbirth and then find out I'm infertile? What if I am fertile, and then get ovarian cancer and become infertile? What if I am fertile, do get pregnant, and then die choking on a grape? (It happens!) Why the fuck should I care if I might have to take a piercing out in ten years? More importantly, why do you, A TOTAL STRANGER, care if I might have to take a piercing out in ten years? I might have to do a lot of things, that doesn't mean I'm going to let my entire life orbit around a single arbitrary future possibility.
Amen, sista! My grandmother (you may know her?) has even pointed out that I do not, in fact, need to be married to have children. It will not stop, so you may as well get used to it. Also, you may want to just go ahead and find a meaning for your tattoo. I got mine because it looked like a cool design from the tattoo guy's book. But I now tell people it is a symbol of my inner and outer selves in perfect harmony and balance.
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